It’s 5 pm, dinner is being made, baths are next, then bedtime, and before you know it, it’s almost 9 pm. You are exhausted and the house is a mess, and you may be feeling overwhelmed, anxious and exhausted.
In fact, you are nearly in tears. You may even feel like a failure because every night you are forced to either accept the mess or push through the sheer exhaustion to clean it all up.
All you really want to do is sit down and relax, enjoy a book or maybe watch your favorite guilty pleasure on tv.
A breaking point
I’ve been there mama.
Feeling overwhelmed and anxiety pushed me to a breaking point.
I remember sobbing on the couch one night, after being snippy with my kids all evening about the mess, and thinking being a mom should not be so hard.
Don’t get me wrong, motherhood is hard. However, the mess I had to deal with every day took me over the edge.
All I was doing was cleaning. If I wasn’t cleaning, the house was a disaster and I felt like a failure.
I was miserable, and all I wanted to do was enjoy my babies. I wanted time to play outside after working all day, and I wanted time to read them a book without the overwhelming sense I had so many other things to do.
There was this huge desire for my time to be more intentional rather than rushed to the next task.
Simple living to help with feeling overwhelmed
One day, I discovered the beauty of a clean, clutter-free home. Not one of those deep cleaning moments just before your in-laws show up. I mean a truly organized and clean home.
It took time, and it took some tough decisions. However, it was all the result of learning to live with so much less and simplifying every aspect of our lives.
You can adopt a minimlaist attitude, without any crazy, strict rules! Maintaining a clean home, with kids, is possible!
Feeling overwhelmed impacts your mom attitude
I don’t know about you, but when I’m feeling overwhelmed as a mom, my crankiness skyrockets. I would never admit this to my husband, but I do recognize when it happens.
We moms carry heavy burdens. We feel like we have to be super mom, and we do many of the things around the house because our dear husbands don’t even realize they need doing!
A messy, cluttered house just fuels feeling overwhelmed as a mom. You may not realize it. In fact, a messy and cluttered house may be your norm. It was for me.
Once you experience the calm of a clutter-free home, I promise you that you will not want to go back.
Decluttering causes you to spend less time cleaning, which helps with feeling overwhelmed as a mom
When there is clutter in your home, not everything has a designated place and much of the space in your home is full. The floors are full, and your organizing bins and baskets may be overflowing.
When there is chaos, it fuels that feeling of being overwhelmed. As moms, we feel this pressure to clean it all up, but think for a moment what it would be like if you could tuck your kids into bed and then just relax because everything was already put away. How lovely would that be?!
Now that our house is decluttered, my kids can run through the house like a tornado, toys everywhere, and we can have the house picked up in less than ten minutes. How? Well for one, we have become happier with less stuff.
Secondly, everything has a place…where it fits. The toy baskets are no longer overflowing, the books all fit on a designated shelf, and art supplies all go into one container. As my five-year-old would say, “easy peasy, lemon squeezy”.
When you have less stuff, intentional parenting becomes easier
When you are feeling overwhelmed as a mom, you either spend less time with your family so you can get things done, or you spend time with your family but feel guilt much of the time.
Let me tell you, mama, you deserve better than this.
You deserve to be able to sit down with your kids and just enjoy them at that moment.
When you have less stuff, you spend less time buying more stuff, less time cleaning up the excess clutter, and then you have more time to just be present.
You can play that game of Don’t Wake Daddy (awesome game by the way) or Old Maid and not have to stress about all the other things you should be doing.
More toys don’t make you a better mom
I used to think I was not spoiling my children, I was just giving them what they needed, including enough toys to fuel their imaginations and deliver every playtime dream.
My kids had princess outfits, costumes, multiple doctors kits, all their favorite stuffie characters, unlimited books, and toy baskets overflowing.
I was doing well I thought. I didn’t allow electronics and most of the toys were not character-specific.
They had SO MANY TOYS. The toy clutter was overwhelming. They couldn’t even clean up the toys without crying because they had no idea where to start.
My own children were stressed out from the clutter invading their own space.
I thought my kids would hate me when I decluttered the kid rooms. I was so surprised by their reactions.
My youngest actually thanked me. Y’all, she thanked me for essentially getting rid of so many of her toys.
She said, “Mama, my room is so much bigger! Thank you!”
Clutter overwhelm impacts kids too. They just can’t express it. Now, when my kids clean, there is still some pushback, but everything has a place. Cleaning is super easy for them when they have less. My kids having more toys than when I grew up did not make me a better mom.
Related: Raise a Happy Kid, Not a Well-Funded Kid
Feeling overwhelmed as a mom doesn’t have to be your norm
Being a mom is hard, but you deserve better than feeling overwhelmed as a mom on a constant basis. Having less stuff can make you happier. It can also make things like regular housecleaning so much easier.
Less stuff doesn’t just make your house neater and prettier. It makes being a mom less stressful. It gives you back the gift of time. You can not only spend more time with your family, but you can also get back more time to do things for yourself.
Your family will also thank you when you move towards a life with less stuff.
The kids will no longer be overwhelmed by cleanup, and their imaginations will grow to a level you didn’t know possible. Your spouse will appreciate and embrace a new cleaner way of living, and your bank account will thank you when you stop shopping.
Your family will fight it as first, no question. However, easier days are ahead mama. Your days of feeling overwhelmed as a mom are limited. There is a better way, and believe it or not, sometimes the better way is less, not more.
For more, check out the benefits of minimalist for moms.
Not sure where to start? Check out these posts on where to start your decluttering journey so you can stop feeling overwhelmed as a mom:
How to Declutter Your Closet (The Guide You Need to Finally Get it Done!)
20 Areas to Declutter Quickly in 20 Minutes or Less (Quick Start Guide)
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Go Green and Save Money: Reusable Kitchen Items
I agree wholeheartedly! I had been slacking on my decluttering, and somehow this came up in a conversation with my yoga teacher, who said, “If the external is chaotic, then the internal can never be at peace.” And sure enough, having a calm, uncluttered (or at least moving in that direction!) home has made me a better mother and wife!
What a great piece of advice, “If the external is chaotic, then the internal can never be at peace.” I wish I had someone tell me this years before I discovered the benefits of a decluttered home. I always thought I needed to clean more. I felt like a failure for not cleaning enough. Turns out, I set myself up for failure simply by the amount of stuff we had. The internal does find peace when the external chaos is gone!